I was surprised to hear on Radio 5 (usually so reliable) that 6 men had been found guilty of sexual assault on a remote Pacific Island.

I say, let them alone, unless the assault was such as to cause environmental damage to the island, what is the harm in it? It may be perverted, and I can not admit to ever having found any geographical feature particularly erotic (I do admit to being slightly aroused by Mrs Williamson talking about tortuous meanders in A level geography, but most things are arousing at that age), but let us concentrate the resources of our legal system on getting after the frog-buggerers and stoat molesters that one reads so much about these days.

Those wishing information with reference to how one goes about sexually assaulting remote islands are, sadly, looking in the wrong place. I am sure there is a web site for it somewhere.

Oh sure! Just turn a blind eye to the rape of the landscape! Are you going to pay for the psychotherapy of all those coconuts?!

The coconuts loved it! Haven't you noticed the extra juiciness of your pina coladas in the last few weeks? And don't get me started on the bananas.

I suppose that in Massachusetts they'll want one-man-one-island marriages now...

But I NEED to know!!!

Can't help you DG, but I can tell you that this site is the only authoritative source of data on "frog buggerers", according to Google.

Thank God I am in the know, then!

My brother's gone to Mount Cook.:)